depression redux

lost in a dark abyss
mired in an unceasing melancholy
my soul aches
a cold darkness engulfs me
it chills me to the bone
waves of dread wash over me
i cry out in despair
my mind is numb
yet at my worst He is still present
Christ's love reaches me
even in my lowly wretched state
how amazing and wonderful
thank you Lord!
i will keep running the race

(c) By Zachary Uram, 2015

My struggle

my thoughts race
at the speed of light
disjointed fragments whiz by

weighed down
in a heavy abyss
lethargy and fatigue reign

a heavy malaise
washes over me
i feel numb

hallucinations torment me
reality is an illusion
an untrusted mind

dissociation comes
i am drowning
in a sea of dreams

an unknown sadness
profound and unending
i ask why

anxiety comes
paralyzing me
with fear and dread

delusions rule
who can discern
the truth of things

but there is hope
in Christ
i finally have peace

(c) 2014 Zachary Uram

More depressing news on how the Church views mental illness

According to this article, more than 50% of Americans believe prayer and Bible study alone can cure mental illness!

This is really worse than I thought things were. Feeling very depressed after reading this article! It's shocking, but at the same time understandable. So few Christians are raised in a way that educates them about mental illness. So few pastors are teaching on mental illness, nor do they provide any resources for those in their churches suffering with mental illness. Couple these factors with the explosive popularity of Charismatic/Pentecostal churches where every disease is believed to be caused by a Satanic attack, and where they believe the cure for every disease is prayer and Bible study! Ugh. This is really appalling.

Mental Illness - mind or body problem?

Here is a professor at a local seminary who is director of their biblical counseling institute. He questions the commonly held view of mental illness as an organic disease and views it as a spiritual matter. His view is that the mind is not part of the body. He says,"Can someone get mentally ill? No. He can be spiritually sinful, physically sick, but the mind cannot get sick and therefore we don't need to cure minds."

It's a shame such views are being taught at seminary! No wonder so many pastors and Christians view mental illness as merely a manifestation of sin. This serves to stigmatize those suffering from mental illness and puts all of the blame on the one suffering which only makes them feel worse! Ugh this gets me angry!

I think very few mental illnesses are caused by sin. Maybe some mild ones, but people suffering with schizophrenia, major depression, bipolar disorder, those are physical organic diseases and have NOTHING to do with sin! And what really irks me is that this guy is the DIRECTOR of the whole biblical counseling institute so he is probably training tons of people who become counselors at their churches! The body and mind are interlinked, but I don't agree with the notion that most mental illness is just a result of sin! That is insane to think that in my view. I agree a holistic approach has merit, and some people with low grade relatively minor mental illness can benefit much from Biblical counseling, but this is not, in my view, the case so much with severe mental illness. If someone gets diabetes or polio do we suddenly start questioning whether it was from sin? Of course not, and we shouldn't question organic mental illness either! The amount of damage being done to Christians with mental illness is mind boggling! And they are being stigmatized and taught that they are at fault for their own suffering! It's sadistic and very wrong. I'd even go so far as to say such teaching is itself sinful. Further, so many suffer needlessly in the Church because they were taught they don't need medication just Biblical counseling, or even worse some are taught that psychiatric medication is itself of the Devil!